well hello everyone- I got lost to life again but came here to raise awareness on ADHD- after all October is adhd awareness month so here it goes…
For those new to my blog, Welcome! You likely stumbled here incidentally but I’m so glad you paused to read about this neurodiversity!
I am a mom of a pre teen – and to two smaller girls who go a little extreme and for work i help people – I am an NP (nurse practitioner)!!
SHIFT (Smile- Harmonize- Inhale-Focus-Try) was developed by myself as a tool to extract a new way to approach dysregulation each and every day for myself and my children.
Nearly 13 years ago I became a mother to a little boy who struggled! He was always in a fight, flight or flea response from the day he came into our world and His cries and unhappy times trumped my own mental health , building into my own why I needed a tool or strategy to survive!
ADHD has a reputation of being a negative label for a behaviour. The years and years of growing up in this society fed this belief onto others – and basically what it comes down to is a blame name for the sufferers. We needed understanding to why he is the way he is…..The bad kid…… so ADHD became his consequence.
Here’s what they missed…
ADHD is a brain chemistry deficit-
ADHD brains have low levels of a neurotransmitter called norepinephrine which is linked with dopamine and Dopamine is the thing that helps control the brain’s reward and pleasure center- so missing this important element leaves a child to suffer…..
Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a common and debilitating neurodevelopmental disorder influenced by both genetic and environmental factors, hypothesized to have developmental origins beginning in utero.
ADHD has features of disorganization and/or hyperactivity/impulsivity, and they can be extreme- That difficult kid is having a hard time interacting- impairing them socially and academically- he’s annoying.
But it couldn’t be …… He’s just badly behaving, attention seeking and an annoying drama queen!
Until it’s your own child suffering. I tried all mechanisms to regain control, but all those parenting disciplines just lead us further into a spiral of out of control.
Our home was dyregulated and no matter how i tried to regain control I lost the battle even more and we all felt the turmoil.
ADHD comes out as behaviour- the temper tantrums, impulsive responses, the suffering behind the poor function lead to total dysruption- but as trying as it was, we landed upon a diagnosis- to which we found our help.
We needed not to judge the child, but to offer him some help- and I needed some myself.
We learned no one sets out to disgust someone else. We learned to stop fighting and lashing out. We found the courage to be kind, and help SHIFT the mind- for our child and ourselves.
We learned that every experience was a trigger. Every stressor, whether it be an external one or an internal one would set off a cascade of behaviour.
It wasn’t at all about failing to pay attention- it was hypersensitive with each new direction so the name was misleading. I would say my son payed attention- so much attention to the trivial tasks leading up to the task itself – causing the frustrations and eruptions.
Hyperactive???? So an understatement. Reactive- makes more sense- – his angry outbursts was impulsivity- because he had poor control over the function of his actions.
Now let’s view ADHD in light of todays society- hand held devices that serve as a major source of dopamine …. but I assure you it’s only a hack…… It will rob your child to learn to stimulate his own feel good path an it will further disrupt his management plan.
Take the 12 year old boy- who is easily intrigued, a great deal naive- and you have strangers behind the scenes! He is an instant addict, not to mention a vulnerable asset- Because it stimulates him- a dopamine habit!
Let’s raise the bar and get to understand their differences. Let’s love them enough to give them their voice again- and let’s change how we coach them, how we educate them, how we influence them- we must make friends with their demons. We must learn not to react- but to respond to them.
When we shift our own mind- we can shift their lives.
Smile- find a way to calm the turmoil- take breaks, change the pace- even if it’s just a moment…..
Harmonize- let it pass- try to understnad what struggle is impacting them in that moment- find peace within to stay calm and regulated-
Inhale- take some deeep breaths- feed the moment some time to let their brain catch up to us-
Focus on the positive aspects of these kids- it’s killing them each and every time we discipline them without understanding their experiences- or their minds.
Try and be an advocate for every child to WIN we need adult champions that can if we want to win avoiding crime and drug addiction!
We all can be the difference……
Shiftyourlifedesign 